I said I loved you but I lied...

Make everything you do worth it.

Fri, 30 Dec 2005 02:41:02 GMT

Hey kids!
Wow, its been awhile since ive last updated cause i really havent hadd anything really go on. But i guess things have been okay, execpt that my dad almost passed away on tuesday...which wasnt too good..he had a heart attack. i seriously dont know what i would do with out him..i love my dad.

Anyways, nothing really has happened..today i went to sandwhich factory with sailor and she asked me something that really made me think. actually she said britt you dont really think about him anymore do you, and i just smiled and for once i could actually say it without lying that i really really havent thought about him, and shes like i didnt think soo, and then she smiled.i guess its just the fact that the kid has changed soo much, that i really dont like him at all. Oh well..im happy and i want it to stay like that.

This break has been pretty kick ass, i love hanging out with my friends and just being care free. I hate school and i dont want to go back at all..
One more year BITCHES! chicago here i come!

I talked to an old friend this week his name is Kyle, i miss him alot..hes really cool to talk to. kyleeee ROCKS!

i realized today on my way home from sandwhich factory that, he mite have liked me. I guess he just didnt wwant to say it, i guess i didnt want to realize it either until now that we dont even speak anymore...which sucks i reallly miss this kidd. things change.

Anyways im gunna go watch a movie with SAILOR, Matt and Andrew.
Latter bitchess!

Time will tell.....fucck, its been 3 years.
I'm finally over it. Im happy being alone.

Sun, 16 Oct 2005 17:10:23 GMT

Thursday, To tell you the truth I can’t remember what I did.

Friday, I had some people over, it really didn’t go how I wanted it to but oh well.
It really wasn’t that fun, actually it was boring..I sat in the dinning room and made annie a pictured we’ll everyone watched a movie. That’s about it.

Last night I went to section8 with Ryan Kallok, and Annie Vicars..i had soo much fun, I actually met a lot of people, I met the singer from dexter’s danger, and that band is awesome. I also met a few new friends..sad part is I don’t know theyre names which sucks. Oh well, I saw Kyle..i really didn’t talk to him, but oh well. I talked to Jay, it kinda made me sad we started talking about my room and how hes gotta come over soon and redo it all, it was niice talking to him though.
After section8 me ryan and annie went to perkins!!! We met up with cory..it was fun.
Then I came home and went straight to bed, I was extremely tired.

Today, I was supposed to go to Cleveland but that didn’t really work out..i wish I was going though..Tonight I mite go to a party im not really in the partying mood but ohh well it mite actually be funn..if I don’t do that bitches call me..well have our own partyyyy! Haha.

That’s all…….

Oh yeah bridget mite actually come over..thatll be funn.

Sun, 09 Oct 2005 23:06:20 GMT

Friday.
Didn't go to school..cause i really didn't feel like it soo Keri called me and asked if me and annie wanted to go to tokyo house and of course we weren't gunna pass up that offer..lol So we went around 3:45 and got there at 4 they said there was a 2 hour wait and well i guess we had nothing better to do soo we stayed and waited..it was funn..i love KEN!!!! =)
After that keri dropped us off and we got readyy and went out with KRISTEN!!! We ennded up going to perkinss. I SAWWWWW AMBER!!! I MISS/LOVE her!!! I called marty and him and dutton and David met up with uss..it was niiice..after perkins we all went to boardman lanes..it was niice..i have fun.
After we all got done bowlingg...i went to annies with kristen and matt and marc came over for alittle, it was niice..Fridays are alwayyss good!

Saturday.
I woke up at 9 and got onlinee..talked too anne..and then figured out planns around 12:30 we went to see tencountfall vs. Mic at the basketball courts and let me telll you tencountfall boys have some skill on the courts..lol it was a very funny site though.
After that we followed marty to boardman lanes..Him and mindy play a game and me, annie sat there i would have to sayy that was kinda boring and i was in a odd moody..after that we made mindy drop us off at home and i did kristens hair for her homecoming which i would have to sayyy came out amazing!!! i love herr. After that me and annie went to thee mall for like 20mins then mindy picked us upp..and we went to see a movie..i was like falling asleep in the movie..it was boring. After that we went bacckk to the mall and sat there..Megan came to visit me!! i love her..shes soo adorable. after that we went home it was about 10..sad yes i know..lol i went home sat by the fire placee..and looked at my phone waiting for someone to call me..but of course that didnt happen..lol soo i decided to play dress up..lol im a loser.

Today!
Well i woke up at 1 and went to lunch with connor my mom and dad , then to store..and then we came home and me and my mom went shopping..i bought a few things..it was nicee..
Now im sitting here drinking coffee..Todays a lovely day.
welll guys thats my weekend!!!!!!
I LOVE YOU ALL!!
Have a great week!

Nothing happens at all.

Thu, 08 Sep 2005 23:04:25 GMT

We're now back in school.
It sucks..i just want to get out of that place..the only class i like is photo =)

I am now not going to homecoming me and britt are gunna hangout! yay!!!!

I've realized how much i really do miss you this past weeeekk. With out you there.

I mitte goo to the football game tomorrow if i dont find anything better to do?
SOOO SOMEONE CALL ME WITH FUNNN PLANS!?

Tencountfall gives me the chills..weird but they do.
Theyre music is amazing..Im a suckker for tencountfall. =/

Runner-up is also an amazing bandd..along with upnext...somee awesome bands..check them out!

Haven't talked to kyle in a weekk!! it sucks.

Anwayss..thats that!!!!!!

I didnt plan for this to happen!! =/ Im falling for you.

Tue, 30 Aug 2005 03:59:28 GMT

I can't explain what i feel anymore..
i guesss im just confused with alot.

Mon, 22 Aug 2005 02:49:02 GMT

This week has been good.

Last night my parents had this rad party and bridget and britt came over..my aunt tried to get me drunk..lol it was funny..i love my Aunt carol.

Anyways..
Kyle called me today!! that made me smile he told me he moved closer to me which is awesome.

Me and eddie are going to homecoming which is awesome hes my best friend.

tomorrow going over bridgets for a fire...ahh im excited.
i love her.

Why does hello feel like goodbye

Tue, 16 Aug 2005 23:22:04 GMT

last journal entry.

the truth..

Kristen did hurt me by hanging out with marty behind my back..actually you both hurt me, but im kinda over that now..Oh well thats all i can say.

Annie go ahead and like Andrew i don't like him...and i wont have a probelm with you liking him because i know you can't help who you like.

Bridget and Brittany..wow i love you both, youve both got really close this summer and im not gunna say it hasnt bothered me cause me and bridget hardly ever talk anymore which sucks..i miss her..britt dont take it the wrong way cause i love you and i can talk to you about anything it just bothers me when your always with her..and im left at home. Oh well agian.

Im not gunna say your name..
I miss you and everyone prolly knows who im talking about but its alright cause it needs get out. i know its pathectic that im still stuck i know cause many people have told me like matt..you tell me soo much get over it..but i guess..when you feel it then youll understand.
I guess what im trying to say is that i hate how things are i hate how we never talk and when we do its like HEYY and thats all you dont askk how are you tell what youve been up to..but i guess your busy..oh well.

lately i feel like im losing my friends not annie but everyone else..im not sure if its my fault but i hope not..i hope it gets better..some friends im happy i lost cause yeah...

I hate how me and eddie never talk anymore it sucks he used be my best guy friend i talked him about everytthing i guess things just are falling apart..

Another thing i really want to hangout with jesse before he goes to college he seems really cool and god knows im up for making new friends.

Kyle...wow your soo awesome you make me laugh all the time i wish you lived closer and we actually got to hangout..i wish i could talk to you more..=/

Tencountfall..wow guys i wish you the best on your ablum..pat told me yesteryday you were having fun there..good luck.

Homecoming..im going but im going with my friends..i dont want to have a date anymore if its not gunna be eddie..but im gunna go to his show and see him before i goo..:)

Anyways finally i got it all out..thats how i feel and people mite be like ohhh stop complaining and im sorry if its brought out to be like that but its not like that its nothing like that its just what i feell..:)

OHh yeah..me and my friends have been hanging out with matt alot..and im happy hes a really awesome person...:)

I just wanna wake up.

Sat, 30 Jul 2005 23:02:50 GMT

I thought for awhile i was totally over you..but then i talked to you and everything came back. I remember a few days you saying you wanted me to be there..and i go just because you said it meant alot if i was there..and you dont even look at me..Okay well maybe you did and maybe you did come and talk to me or should i say you came and talked to the people i was by and i just happened to be there. All i really can say anymore is "Oh well " which really sucks but it happens. i guess what im trying to say is that i wish you weren't too busy for me.

Another thought..Im glad were friends now i really am, mostly because theres so much less drama in my life when we're friends..and another reason is because no matter what anyone says you are a awesome person..and i love being around you, But the thing that makes me mad is that everytime i see you and him together your either fighting or giving him a hard time and i hate seeing him have to go out of his way to make you smile..when in the back of my head im saying why aren't you smiling..your soo lucky to have him..maybe you just dont realize how amazing he is but then maybe you do im not sure?

I try to stay off the subject of him and her because i know it annoys people when i talk about it thats why i havent said anything to anyone. i mean i have friends i can talk to about it but sometimes i think its just better if i dont say anything at all.

I was on my way home from my aunt carol's house..and i was just looking up in the sky thinking about things, like im 16 and i have nothing to look forward to, i mean i live in boardman we do the same things over and over agian..and i HATE it..mostly what im trying to say is that i really love chicago and i think i really need to go back..it was seriously thee best week of my life..just driving into the city for the first time, was like a life changing experenice in my life..the cool thing about it there is its not a little town where everyone knows everyone..you can be yourself, with out people saying woah..."what is she wearing?" or "Eww, look at her shoes." i mean they still do that but for some reason no one cares.
i dunno really hope soon i can go back and just relax there, i love the city, i cant wait till after senior year, im moving up there with my aunt..away from here.

Please, if your gunna comment saying get a life or just be stupid about it please just don't comment?
kthanks.

Until next time,
Britt

the beat goes on....

Thu, 21 Jul 2005 16:52:31 GMT

Well everything has been really awesome!!
Ever since i got home, things have just been happening for the best, i lost a few friends but its for the better i guess? oh well i realized who my real friends were!!! me and britt have been hanging out a hole lot more which is really rad.

Yesterday Megan Cartwright came over at like 2 and didnt leave till like 11 we just sat around she made me clean my fucking room! shes a loser..we drove around! IN MY PARENTS CAR! lol they actually let her..lol My parents love her.

Lately my parents have been really cool..but really stressed out cause of my grandma..my parents know ive been going through alot..soo they have been really cool about things. My aunt came home shes leaving tomorrow though! which sucks..but she said at the end of the summer im flying back up to chicago to teach her how to sew!!! and i think i mite bring britt..shell love it there. anyways..things have been great!!

Oh and ive been talking to some old friends and im really stoked about that too cause soon were gunna hangout! which will be rad..i cant wait.

SUMMER HAS BEEN AWESOME

Fri, 15 Jul 2005 03:26:57 GMT

RANDOM THOUGHTS.

i just got back from Chicago, It was really FUN! i had a good time...i didnt get to see my Aunt which sucked but shes coming home tomorrow which im pretty stoked about.

Ive been hanging out with Cartwright and Rossi alot...i really like hanging out with themm..Ive known them forever..I love them!

Ive kinda been losing touch with my old friends it weird i never really talk to them..and when i do its always them talking about boys..or something like that all i want to do it just have fun. But its kinda okay because i really like hanging out with different people and meeting new people...its kinda fun :) i guess everythings just falling apart.

I talked to Court today i miss her soo much!! She called me today just to catch up on things..me and her really need to hangout soon hopefully, because shes like one of the only people i can trust.

I really really miss my sister..i know that sounds weird but today was the first day in 2 weeks where i saw her..it sucks, shes getting married soon and soon eough shell be gone she have her new life..ahh i miss my sister.

Tonight me Megan and Megan all just drove around with this kid GENE..lol it was soo fun, i really didnt think i was gunna do anything until cartwright called me and came over but i was like oh well im gunna go..im glad i went. it was alot of fun hopefully tomorrow well hangout agian :)

Well i try...

Sun, 03 Jul 2005 18:23:30 GMT

Friday- Me, Annie and Kristen went to CiCi's pizza i really dont like theyre food but Kristen and Annie did..lol We saw Corey Weaver!! i love that kid. After that we just drove around ended up stopping at sparkle becus i needed Green tea..and i saw MATT! i miss matt hes an awesome kid and we never get to hangout anymore..it sucks..Soo later that night we ended up hanging out with Ryan Kallok and his friends..it was actually really really fun...after that we all just went home..

Saturday- Section8 a waste of my money!!!! err..but its okay cause i ended up having fun..
DAVE MELILLO!!! = AMAZING!!! i love his music and i loved hanging out with him!!! and Matt from rookie of the year..theyre band is rad too..:) So after that we just hung out and waited for annies mommy and dad to come and get us..soo finally they came and picked Me Marty Annie and Kristen up..the ride home was interesting..after that we called Kallok to see if him and his friend wanted to come over for a fire, they came we all talked..well they all talked..i really didnt talk much..but i had a few reasons i guess..after that i came home and just talked to some people! :)

Well i guess from what some people say i have some personailty issue that i must work on..
Im not confident eough and maybe im not..maybe i dont love the way i look or maybe im just not an out going person..maybe i needed you to be the one who came up to me..maybe im the one who just sits around and waits for things to happen..Maybe but is that soo wrong? I dont think soo...but i guess it is..Oh well..
Other than that i guess that was my weekend..

Today im going to the Airport to Pick my BROTHER and my MOM!! im excited theyre coming back from Flordia!!!
I leave in 3 days to go to chicago!! i come back the 12 and then im going Straight to the lake..Theres a select few im going to miss..but theres also a select few i cant wait to get away from..:) Hopefully this will be an amazing vacation that me and annie wont forget!!!

Oh GUESS WHAT!!! i was asked by the wardens to go back on vacation with them!!!! OH YESS! i cant wait..the wardens love me!!!

Wed, 29 Jun 2005 04:33:52 GMT

Lately things have been looking up!! Im pretty happy..SUMMER ROCKS! i love hanging out with my friends everyday!!
KRISTEN ANNIE AND BRITT YOU ROCK!!!

Oh im friends with Allison agian shes been coming over its pretty cool!!

I never really had someone i could talk to like the way me and you do.
Its amazing to have that feeling..i trust you more than i trust some of my closest friends.. And i know this year we had our fights and little stupid arguments but for some reason we always made up. Theres this one thing about you that still till this day makes me haappy that im friends with you..its the way you look at life...you never want to be like anyone else..your always about being yourself..and being the one who wants to change the world and i belive that one day you will..and youll do it with your music..music means the world to you..and i know this because everytime we talk about it i can just hear it in your voice, its your life and i know if you dont ever make it with music, i know atleast youll die trying..Ah..theres soo much about this kid that no one really takes the time to look at hes amazing..i love being around him..he has helped me through alot this year..he means the world to me..im soo happy me and him are friends..i hope that me and him stay friends..because i really dont know what i would do if i didnt have someone like him to talk to.

I dont know where that came from i guess you just starting thinking, i just wanted everyone to know how amazing he is. i hope nothing ever changes for me and him.

i dont want to fall to peices.

Sun, 19 Jun 2005 20:18:43 GMT

Well, i though summer was going well but i guess not..ive been just havin people over and well i guess last night things got out of hand and people started to drink and well i got in to trouble because of if..which sucks cause i know i didnt do anything..but i should have stopped them..Oh well i guess ill have to get used to the grounded thing.
Today when my parents saw the beer, for some odd reason the only person i wanted to talk to was you..i wanted to tell you im sorry..but now im asking myself what im sorry for..did i drink? NO. the only thing i did wrong was let them have it and i know it was bad and i made my mistake..and belive me it wont happen again. It was weird..all i wanted to do was say sorry and just cry..i didnt want to talk about it all i wanted to do was cry you were the only one who wouldve told me it would be okay..and no matter what you would always be there..but the thing is your not there..and i cant even call..or Im you and i dunno it makes me upset...and i know this mite not seem like its a big deall but to me it is..cause my parents have been telling everyone how great a kid i am and how amazing i am..and how i make the right decisons but now all i can think about is how everytime they tell someone how great of a kid i am,that its all a lie..things have been all messed up today..i just want today to be over..it sucks sitting here not even being able to think straight because im worried about my dad thinking im a bad kid..i dont want that..i wish i could go back in time and erase everything ive done for the last past 2 years..and forget about all the people i met i wish i was back in St.charles when i was there..it was like i was a little kid who knew nothing..and now its like im learning and making all theses mistakes i just hate it all..

Other than the beer thing a fight happened at my house..My best friend..deserves the world..i hate when shes sad or upset..and well you make her upset you hurt her in ways you dont even know..and the way you acted last night im sorry but that was uncalled for..especailly at my house..im sorry but that made me mad. And for you not to even care when one of your friends were yelling at me and telling me all this shit you just sat there and told me not to listen..but the thing is its hard not to and just to let you know this isnt to just piss you off..you really really hurt me and my friend no matter if you care, or not i thought you and your friend were rude..but i guess you dont care do you?

On the other hand..i started to like you and well i think i still mite..but its weird this hole year ive liked you on and off..but after last night i dont if i should even care, you like that other girl..maybe i just ment to be alone..im not sure anymore..and i its not worth being upset..

The fact is it not worth it anymore..nothing is worth it i just want the rest of my summer to be with Annie Bridget and Britt..Because best friends are always there for you and well boys arent no matter how much they say theyll always be there, theyre not going to be soo give up now.

Lately this past week all i can think about is how bad i miss Bridget this summer isnt gunna be the same..ive been talking to her on the phone but i havent seen for 2 weeks..and that is weird for me cause i used to see that girl everyday...i just wish she would move back. her grandpa has been really sick and it sucks cause hes like a grandpa to me too i grew up with him and if anything ever happened i think i would die..I just hope he gets better.

Well i think im done complaining.

"The truth is that ive never fallen so hard."

Sat, 11 Jun 2005 16:03:24 GMT

FINALLY, Its summer!!!
I talked to alot of people i saw amber and amanda wow i miss them like crazy..theyre amazing.i hung out with RYAN!!! which was fun me ,him and annieare going skateing soon!!
i got to eat this really really good stucker. thanks to my buddy RJ! i love him..hes aweesome to talk to. tonight was i guess okay..it could have been better..but oh well right?
Well thats okay..cause i ended up realizing alot,
that the person standing right infront of me is amazing..and i think im starting to like him. it mite be bad. but im not sure..
Second..ive realized not just yesterday but alot this week that i have 3 amazing best friends who deserve everything, im always smiling when im with them..i love you Annie Britt and Kristen. :)
Oh, and fuck you...i thought you were amazing...i thought you were a person that made everyone smile..well i guess you like making everyone BUT me smile..i cant belive i even took the time to write that paper on you..which i did get a awesome grade on and the thing is my teacher even said i picked a good person for my paper..the paper was about someone you looked up to and someone you love being around..but i guess now id rather just stay as far as possible.

Anyways..Oh the good note..Bam bam wrote his paper on me. it made me smile...he wrote about how i have a awesome personailty and how i never care what people think about me, and how im always laughing..it was really awesome of him to do that. i hope he meant it.

Tomorrow i have soo much to do..i have My cousins commenciment and then i have Brians graduation party then i have Keris..and then i have Annies birthday party!! and well today i have Chris's party...wow this weekend should be exciting. Anyways i think this is all i have to say really...

I prolly wont be updating alot..i have alot of vacations this summer..soo i most likely wont be here.

Where are you and where am i?

Fri, 20 May 2005 01:33:45 GMT

Im not gunna let things bother me.
Im done worrying about what people think of me and if they hate..and as many people can tell this hasn't been a bery good week for me..Just stupid little things have been happened that i really dont need to happen right now..Plus..alot is on my mind and with people just bugging me trying to talk to me isnt helping very much i just need my time with my best friends not have to worry about anything. School sucks soo bad its like everyday this week someone has made me feel like shit, wether its a girl i dont even know or if its someone i do know..i wish school would just be over but then i dont its like i want one thing but i want another thing. Ah, this all sucks. One thing i know i said i would never talk about or even think about has been runing through my head like crazy i cant stand anything anymore..its like i sitt here everyday for no purpose..i dunno what to do anymore...i try everyday to hold my feeelings in and not talk about them because i feel annoying saying the same thing over and over agian. Ahh...im done.

It drives me wild....

Sun, 17 Apr 2005 03:14:38 GMT

Last night i hung out with Bridget. it was real fun.
Sorry to everyone i was a bitch to i didnt mean it. any of it.

Today ive sat here and done nothing, just sat and here and thought about summer and how bad i want it to come. I was talking to this one kid today and out of no where we both brought up that we wanted to move and get out of boardman and well..i was saying how i know everyone here hates me and maybe if i moved i could leave it all behind..but he said no matter where you go itll always be the same..people will always be gay..but i just think that if i moved i could leave everything behind..but maybe now that i think about it if i want my life to be different maybe i dont have to move maybe i just have to start over like he said..but its hard..but maybe just maybe i can do it..even though ive tried before. maybe i just didnt tired hard eough..this summer that is my goal..forget about everything meet amazing people and just start over..even though nothing will be as great as it used to i still will be able to smile and have fun and forget about it all. i think thats all i need. thanks for that conversation i really missed talking to you.

Anyways on another note...im grounded agian! for reasons im not too sure of..but its okay..as long as im not grounded next weekend! i want to hangout with courtney and megan!

OH yeah today megan rossi came over..i never really talk to her anymore. me and her used to be best friends and i kinda miss it we both have changed soo much its weird..but still will always love just hanging out with her and talking to her...:)

After tonight i kinda feel better about my self..im not worried about people hating me or judging me ...as a awesome friend said.. " the only people who you should care about are the ones that know you." Cause in the end the people who hate me dont really know me.

if i had a chance to start agian this is what id do.

Fri, 15 Apr 2005 17:30:38 GMT

Ah...friends suck.
I wish i could move away and make a hole new life one were my friends dont care if i go to school or not..or friends where they ask you "hey do you want to hangout?" But no not here in good old boardman...i just seriously want out..if i could pick up and move right now i would..i would get out of this fucking place.. i wouldnt have to worry about my friends hurting themselves... or even him...and just school and all the drama there..i could move and just never ever look backk..and the sad thing is that i know not that many people would even know i was gone because to some people they dont even notice that im there half the time..i just want to move soo bad.

My friends well theyre doing stupid stuff..i mean why would you want to hurt your self..yeah it takes your mind off things but in the end what does it do? im sorry but i do not want to go through that all agian with my friends..that was hell and im never going back. Maybe im just different maybe i just think different, ive been through hell and back with my parent but NEVER have i tried to hurt myself. i just dont feel theres a reason too..and well if you dont stopp...i dont think i can sit through it all over agian..Im sorry.

Alsoo...I dont want to even think about him...to even look at him..although he is an amazing person and doesnt know it, i just dont need to feel like shit anymore. i am a human and i do mean something in the world wether you want to know that or not. i just dont see why once in awhile other then when im crying my eyes out why you just cant pick up a phone or just Send an IM? i dont really get it anymore.. Im also not gunna sit here and blame you..because most of the reason we dont even speak to eachother is because of me. and ive said soo many times that im sorry.

Off of that subject because i hate that subject..i think that i should start hanging out with some new people..like make more friends and just not hangout with my best friends..i should be more open to hanging out with people...

i think im done writing in the stupid thing...

Wed, 13 Apr 2005 01:50:26 GMT

Friday- i went with Megan Cartwright to her brothers baseball game then after that courtney called me and me her megan and annie all went to the talent show..it was really fun we were just being dorks. After that i called luke and we ordered food and well we were waiting fo rthe food to be done we went to target cause it was lukes birthday soo we all got him some weird gifts..lol after we got the gifts we went to get the food and then we alll went back to my grandmas before luke got there we all blew up balloons and wrapped his gifts he walked in the door and was like OH MAN!!! this is sweet thanks guys...that kid is soo nice...after luke left we all went up stairs and just talked about random things i found out alot of things that i didnt know and im happy i do know them now.

Saturday- Oh god you guys prolly dont even want to know..
Soo me and annie woke up and walked to taco bell..got food of course then back to my grandmas after that we both got ready to go to the Grange hall. it was fun at first but after like an hour of being there my mom calls me and flips out on me for reasons no one needs to know..but like for an hour she kept calling back and yelling saying what are you gunna do..i have never cried soo hard.aand well i never cry in front of people and i did...that was the worst dayy..then after all that my mom wanted me home at 9:30 but of course i didnt have a ride..soo i called courtney she said yeah sure thats what friends are for..soo her and luke came to pick me up we dropped him off and then we went back to my house after being there for like a half hour me and court wanted slushes soo we went to sheetz and then to the Grange hall..we brought my brother with us..lol it was fun..she always makes me smile when im sad. then after being at the grange hall for like 10 mins i was like okayy i dont want to be here..soo we left and came back to my house. Soo we came home and were talking about how our days were and well theses 4 fire trucks come zooming up the street courtney and me are like pissing our pants we were scared sooo i guess it was a fire like 2 houses up from me..nothing big, but after that courtney left..and i went to be bed cause i had soo much on my mind..and i just needed sleep...that weekend wasnt good..at all.

This week has been hell for me i hate being in school cause every time i walk in a hall or in a class room i feel like everyone hates me..i just wish everything was normal..i wish i wouldnt have to live like this..i just want out of school..i dont want people to hate me...

Lately courtney and me have become really good friends and that makes me happy cause well shes someone i can talk to and she understands what im going throught with the hole boy thing...i really like hanging out with her because no matter what i have fun..Anyways..i just want to say thanks to everyone who was really a great friend staurday...Julian,Annie,Bridget,Britt,Courtney,Luke, and you know you are..just thanks alot even if you just said britt its gunna be okay..cause well it means alot to know i have friends and people who care when im feeling like shit.

well anyways i think im done here...but ill be back soon..
Comment??

And..im sorry we cant be friends...

Tue, 05 Apr 2005 02:11:58 GMT

My spring break was pretty good.

I just love hanging out and not having to worry about school, and all that other stuff. I hung out with alot of different people i didnt think i would..me and kristen saw eachother almost every single day wether it was her coming over or us just driving around..i love her it really awesome how me and her got soo close i can tell her everything.
Also i hung out with Courtney..One day we went to the village and then to this place in amish town for her mommy. it was a really fun time. Then friday me her annie and britt all TRIED! to get to section 8 but it didnt work out to well...we got VERY lost for about 2 hours we ended up everywhere but there. i dunno this break has been really fun.. i didnt want it to be over.

OH YEAH..Anyone if you see Bridget Yurcusin then go up to her and tell her how amazing her hair is..lol cause well i did it! GO ME! It was my first hair cut..i was pretty excited.

Ahh...well anyways..A whole lot has been going through my head, that im not gunne put on here for the hole world to see and read cause well they just dont need to know everything about my life.

This friday is gunna be awesome! me Annie and Courtney are gunna have a sleepover! im soo excited!
Today i hungout with ABAA!! it was really fun..we hungout around the neighborhood.

Well im gunna go...
(Britt) ----> Aboo!

break me down...

Thu, 24 Mar 2005 00:48:51 GMT

Please tell me im dreaming.
All i can do right now is sit here and wait, wait for nothing to happen. And it sucks i just wish i could be the one with theyre dreams coming tru...
Anyways break is coming tomorrow,im pretty excited about it im going with annie and her amazing family to cinnicnati which shoulld be fun. Me and courtney are supposed to hangout over break too, shes an awesone person. i kinda just want school to be over..have nothing to worry about you know..its like summer is my getaway from the world? i dunno its like in the summer i dont worry about anything i just do what i want. Its just this year has sucked really bad i want it to be over. So many people hate me and so many people talk about me. and i dunno there is some good parts of this year i made alot of new friends. and i love hanging out with them..but i lost alot of good friends..i miss them alot. this year has just been not soo good. Anyways, i just thought i would let that out.

Anyways.. i hope this break doesnt go like the others..which it prolly will. i cant wait till i go to chicago..i seriously have been asking my parents if i could move with my aunt to the city this just isnt the place for me i just need to leave and forget about people. Yeah i would miss my friends terribly but i think in the end it would all be worth it. I would have to make all new friend and meet all new people but i think i need that i need to move i need to get out of this place. i dont want people hating me and my friends i dont want people hating me..for reasons i dont know why? ahh, i just want out. Maybe if i go there this summer ill love it so much i wont want to leave..but then theres always that feeling in the pit of my stomach saying i have friends here i have a past...but i guess its just time for me to forget about all of that..? right ? i dunno..but i think thats all for now.

Britt-Ann

Suck what?! :)

Thu, 17 Mar 2005 17:13:36 GMT

Wow, i havent updated in sometime..
I dont really have anything to talk about lately i have just been hanging out with my friends and being stupid..Which is always a plus.
Last night me annie and britt walked to sparkle! we saw matt! i love that kid..then we came home and ate..and well talked about the starting line concert were going to this saturday!! yay! i love this! after that britt left and matt came over and well we all just talked and did stupid crap. it was fun real fun actually cause i havent hung out with matt in sometime. after that i went home..and well went to bed cause it was late.
Oh yeah i stayed home from school today! cause well im sweet like that.. i have missed 2 days this week..oh well i hate that place..its all drama.
Soo anyways, that pretty much all i have been doing..cause well me and my boring life. well thats all for now guys! :)

OH MAN IM SOO PUMPED FOR SATURDAY!
Summer is coming soon!!

Baby is this love for real?

Sat, 05 Mar 2005 19:17:42 GMT

Well..i had an awesome night hanging out with kristen last night! :) and im prolly hanging out with her tonight..Cause well i cant go anywhere cause my mom has a work party that my dad and her have to go to..but its okay cause i think Kristen,Courtney,Bridget,Brittany,And Annie might all come over and just hang out here. i dunno it mite be funn..

GUESS WHAT EVERYONE! there is exactly 102 days till warped tour! im soo pumped...i want it to be summer, me and kristen were planning our summer out today..were big big losers..We have decided that we are going to every concert around here..itll be a fun summer..i dunno im soo excited anyways, just thought i let everyone know how extremely excited i am for summer to come..

Oh yeah March 13th! The Starting Line show..IM soo Going!

Last night was funn...My GRAMA is awesome! GO GRANDMA ANNIE! :)

I still can't turn away.

Thu, 03 Mar 2005 23:19:28 GMT

Sooo lately everything has been awesome...
Me and annie finally are back to normal...we have been talking alot, its good i hope we hang out this weekend. I love AMV.

I just got done talking to my aunt maria, i miss her shes amazing..she lives in chicago and she is always telling me to come there and she says i would love it there, cause well i want to live in new york city, and and where but ohio is amazing she says...she really wants me to get out of here..get out of here and make something of myself..she says, that i have talent..she says she loves my fashion, and i KNOW how to do hair like no other..and i shouldnt be here in ohio doing that, i need to get out in the world and show people what i can do..and i dunno she makes me smile when she tells me that.. My aunt knows that my life has been fucked up and my life isnt like normal peoples..and thats why shes always saying awee hunni come here..she really really wants me to live there..and go to college there..and thatd be cool but i have had the dream of new york since i was little and i told her that and she said "well brittany dont give up on that dream then, but you always know im here if you want to move here." She said that this summer i can come there and bring a friend, with out my mom...that would be sweet..if i brought anyone i think it would be annie cause no matter what i never get sick of her...we always have funn...and shes always saying how she loves it there. i dunno...

I havent been to school in 2 days...all my friends are calling me and telling me they miss me. And well telling me about theyre day...
I miss them too!

lately i cant get you out of my head...i want to but for some reason everytime i try it just doesnt work? i guess ive just been thinking about alot.

Back in school they never taught what we needed to know...

Tue, 01 Mar 2005 02:30:57 GMT

Well, Alot has happened..I met this new kid hes pretty cool i guess...i alos met a new friend..shes awesome..her name is courtney and i love hanging out with her...
Friday was different i guess...I went with Brittany Annie Kristen Matt Ricky and Adam..and Pat. We all were supposed to go bowling but it didnt work out so we ended up going to taco bell and then sitting in matts car..it was fun actually. Then Saturday i went to jillians to see Afs..it was fun i met up with courtney and we hung out we were there for like 20 mins and decided we were bored cause afs wasnt playing for while soo we left went to walmart and by a few peoples houses...and just talked it was fun i know alot about her now..and well now she knows alot about me..it was fun after driving around for awhile annie wanted to go home..so courtney took her home..and after that we went back to jillians to see afs play...i will have to say Afs is absoutely amazing..they are going to get soo far with theyre music its crazy..thats just what i think thought....great show guys.
I would have to say this weekend has been real confusing..

I really dont know what im doing anymore..it sucks..i mean i thought i was getting over the fact that he was out of reach now..but this past weekend made me think espeacially friday.
After friday i called him...and he called me back, which i didnt expect him to but for some odd reason he did..which made me sad but you would think it would make me happy..ughh..Oh well though right.

I want to say im sorry..im sorry to my best friend annie..Im sorry that this is happening, i dunno why this weekend i was mad at you and i will admit i was and well kinda still am..but ill talk to you about that sometime..when my mind is thinking right..Which it isnt right now. Im sorry..cause i love you..and i dont want it to be like that.

Err..i dont want to go to school next week i really dont..i hate going to school. today i did not want to be there, and about everyone in the world could prolly tell..cause i didnt talk to anyone..expect bridget and courtney..i dunno anymore..i kust hate going to school.

Well this was one long entry..maybe ill updated sometime soon..i dunno.
I love you all.

</3.Britt. I just want to say sorry to everyone, sorry for not talking to you..sorry for being a total fag today..and well yesterday..and well saturday.

We all fall down.

Mon, 21 Feb 2005 21:15:00 GMT

Well..the Ski pretty awesome..:)
Alot of HOT boys..lol Today im gunna sit here and write about my lovely friend Eddie!

I love Eddie he is awesome..Eddie is thee coolest person in the world whenever i need someone to talk to i always go to him..Lately we have talked alot about like things that are going on in our lives..Girls, Boys, His band and friends..cause well lately i have had some trouble with my friends. hes like seriously the only boy i can talk to about things like my past and stuff..cause well for some weird reason i feel that he knows what im talking about and he know how i feel..I dont know what i would do with out him and i thank him for that..:) I love you eddie..And no matter what we always have to be friends and i want you to know that i am always! ALWAYS here for you. :)
Thanks for being that amazing friend i could always run too.
And oh thanks agian for you and your band playing at my party! you guys were amazing!

Well tomorrow is school ahh! i hate school i didnt want this weekend to end! it was soo AMAZING!! i met alot of new people..:)

</3.Britt